THREE THINGS I LEARNED DURING THE FIRST HALF OF OUR PREGNANCY

Rheyn and I moved to our new home right after our wedding and honeymoon. For both of us, being independent is not new because we both left the comfort of our parents’ houses during our college days. After earning our university degrees, we worked to support our families, send our younger siblings to college, and provide for their needs. These responsibilities, among many others (work, ministry, etc.), prepared us to where we are right now.  

In our new home, we fairly share tasks and chores. She is a full-time MS student and a house wife, while I am a full-time employee, dedicated husband her, and a part-time MS student. It is amazing how we juggle everything at home, but through God’s grace, we are able.  

Then Fave came in to our lives. Since then, I think I did pretty well. From cooking our breakfast early in the morning, being a full-time employee, doing errands and groceries after work, preparing our dinner, cleaning our home, and even finishing our laundry late in the evening. It was tiring but fulfilling, especially during the first trimester when Rheyn needed to be extra careful. It stretched my capacity physically, mentally, and even emotionally. 

I may have been missing some things because of our pregnancy, but here are three things (among many others) I learned and enjoy doing now: 

1. Baking 

When cooking became a battlefield during this time, baking became a new weapon for me. I am more of a cook rather than a baker. Cooking is easy. You are free to do anything. You can add if your taste buds say so and adjust if necessary. Baking is totally different in terms of techniques, precision, and timing. One extra whip or whisk and your gluten will get overworked. One extra teaspoon of baking ingredient and you might start all over again. A wrong temperature setting might give you a headache and piss you off.   

What I did is to really start from scratch. In addition to learning from video tutorials and recipes in video streaming site, I think it is necessary to understand the use of each baking ingredient, its function and uses. Thanks to my chemistry and chemical engineering background, it made me appreciate the baking process, its chemical and physical components, and the thermodynamics behind it (wow!).  

The best baked product that I have so far is the humble and awesome carrot cake (insert Gordon Ramsey’s accent here. By the way, we’re a fan of Masterchef TV series). Why carrot cake? My wife always set aside carrots on her plate so I decided to bake it into a cake. In this way, she and our Fave will get beta carotene and vitamins from this bright produce.   

2. Gardening  

My wife is a licensed agriculturist. She is currently finishing her MS Horticulture degree in the same university from which we earned our bachelor’s degrees. We have a small front yard in our house; she started preparing soil mixes and planting herbs and vegetables the moment we moved in.  When one of her subjects required her to conduct a field trial/experiment, she did it in the comfort of our home. She was also able to sell a good number of potted basil and dill. She even bought several oyster mushroom bags and made a mini mushroom house at the back of our house. I helped her during weekends, and I found it as a good physical activity. 

When the global pandemic hit our lands, gardening became more than a physical activity but a hobby. I feel like I was overtaken by the spirit of my grandfather who had a small parcel of land that he always cultivated during our younger years. More than a stress reliever, (edible) gardening made me value every food that comes in our kitchen because, in one way or another, an honorable farmer worked hard for it.   

3. Love what you hate before. 

You know what I hate? Going up and down the stairs. And because I’m the only one who can do it right now, I turned it into a hobby. I went up and down our stairs at least 10 times per day.  ‘Exercise, kunyari’. ? Our stair is a bit steep. On the first trimester, we brought down our bed to our living room. She would stay there the whole day before her MS class started; with her other things still in our room, I would go and get them for her. 

I may have done and learned a lot of things since Fave came, but these are just small things compared to what my wife needs to endure and ensure during this season.  

“Let all that you do be done in love.” – 1 Corinthians 16:14 

This has always been a reminder to us. Love is such an overused word. But we realized that it is more than an emotion, it is more than an expression; it is a decision you have to make each day even if it is hard. Fave deepens its meaning for us. You can really do everything for love.